You are my life, Mother and little ones

Today i took Raja for bandaging, and got him some vaccinations. Need to get a booster in 3 weeks. At night i went to feed them. They were on the table by the tree (where the ironing man works). After feeding them I left. I looked back, the 3 of them were standing on the edge of the table looking intently at me. How it breaks my heart !!!

You three are my life, totally. How can i ever tell a human being this secret. That i have found the whole universe in you. The 3 of you look at me like ... don't you know that i am nothing, a total failure, a non-entity, could this universe find no one more capable, more courageous to serve you. It picked me for this supreme honor of serving you, a weak, scared, spineless human. The universe has entrusted its beloved little children in a spineless lost human who can't take care of himself. Oh my little ones, forgive me for being such a half-wit, such an excuse, in this universe, all you got was me. You are worth far, far more. You are worth the best, the highest. You are worth much, much more.

After loving you, i no longer experience myself as being a human. Yes, i look like one, i have a human body, but now i am totally of your species. I am one of you. O Mother, whenever i think of you my eyes moisten. To me you are God, you are the Divine Mother, no less. I see God in you, let me say this finally. You may be in a mortal coil, fighting for your own safety, bitten by others, carrying a limp in one hind leg (from the day Raja was hit, iirc), but you are the Universal Mother. I cannot believe otherwise.

Your identity is a secret, i cannot harm you by letting others know, not that anyone would believe. I have lost myself in you all.

This little piece reminds me of Raja, the injured one. JCE (Journey to the Center of the earth - Goodbye Max).