Conscious Living begins

I know it's a bit premature to say such things.

As most of the time goes in awareness, or being awareness, or just being (unlike the earlier completely mind-controlled or mind-conscious state), it is like a new life. An aware or conscious life.

Awareness is just a normal state now. The initial excitement was perhaps due to mind-labeling, now that the mind has stopped labeling, it's just become a normal state.

One can now appreciate that the mind was a disease. The stink has not yet completely washed off. I can say that I am out of the prison gates, the guards are still running after me holding on now and then, but physically I am out. There will never be any suffering for me again. For others around me, yes, there is a lot of pain to see everyone trapped totally in their mind-prisons, everyone still identifying with the imaginary wispy mind-story, rather than the tangible, real, ever-present awareness.

This is a milestone, maybe a small one. Maybe one day I will look back and think how naive and foolish I was to think suffering was actually over in March 2010, or that i was free of the mind at this point. I will look back and laugh at this day. But it is at this stage that the struggle to be aware was over, and at this stage the identification shifted over, or began to.

Yes, awareness is not continuous for me, the mind is not dead, there are memories, I still talk of yesterday and tomorrow with others, I still refer to this body as "I" and me. This activity of blogging "my" state is a mind/ego activity.
I do not know who is aware of this awareness, who perceives this perceiver, who witnesses this witness. I still prefer to be physically by myself so i can remain in awareness as long as possible. I keep away from entertainment, TV, and socializing so I can remain silent as much as possible. That has to be done.
The mind still takes me to the Shiva statue in the park nearby for a quick prayer to give me strength to defeat the mind and be myself forever, to be free of the illusion.