what perceives the I-am?

I feel like i am hitting my head against a wall. It is clear that the silence or Nowness or I-ness is perceived by something. That something is perceiving all this.

But getting a handle on this something.... everything turns out to be something arising in ... me ... even the one looking is arising in me, but what is "me". Even the one reporting it is difficult is arising in me. I have been so deeply frustrated since yesterday, its like a wild-goose chase, and yet there *is* something here that is alive and exists. There is undeniably awareness behind all these arisings.

One's entire life is spent at the level of what is arising temporarily, not what registers all this.