They followed me around

Today, morning I saved a little milk from Raja and Mother's share and went to the park. Had to wake up the 2 little pups, they had it happily and then sat up in the tea stall. Their mother just watched quietly, did not wish to come and have some. But the other black and white mother came over from the shack and was looking hungrily at me. I felt terrible, that i had nothing for her. I promised i would get some biscuits later, but felt awful going away leaving her hungry.

Later, i did go with some biscuits and fed her.  The tea stall was empty today. I gave one biscuit to the 2 pups who were running amok in the park. They gave a few tiny barks, can hardly believe that they could manage a bark! I lifted them up both and put them to my cheeks. What joy. The brown one nibbled my ear a bit. The white one just looked about. Then they followed me all around the park (one complete round of the left section) for the first time. Finally, i shook them off. And they wrestled in the center.

How it aches to think of them all hungry there, and me eating properly. I just cannot enjoy anything, always think of them. Then as i went around to the other side of the park, I met the other larger pup, the B/W one who came up to me readily and played with me. His shy brother later met me, but as always was afraid, and refused to come close.

So now in the late mornings I do go to the foresty park for a brief walk. It helps me clear my head, and get into the present/I am. Although, of course I do keep having dog thoughts.