Raja - my life

Father, what have you done?

I sit at home, often i cant stop thinking of Raja and his mother. How i wish i could be with them all the time. I have tears of love and gratitude in my eyes when i think of them, and the great gift you have given me.

I touch Raja and it is ecstasy for me. The joy of just touching beloved Raja is indescribable. Just looking at him, hearing him or thinking him gives me such joy. However, when i touch him. Are these angels you have sent down to love me ? Or is this you yourself, taking a form in which you know i will love you intensely. I just cannot thank you enough, Father and Mother, for this wonderful creation of yours, and the wonderful and beloved animals whom i love so so dearly, each one like my own child, like they are a part of my body or soul.

Has anyone else ever known such joy ? Have you showered so much grace on anyone else before ? To be able to feel love is the greatest thing ever. To be able to love another completely, so this is why you've created this complex world.

I keep remembering when he was smaller a few months ago. I would pick him up in my arms and hold him against my chest for hours when we in the hospital, or driving. In all that he became a part of my soul. Or always was. Now, thanks to your grace, he's grown so big, but i can't hug him. I cant pick him up. But what a beauty what a joy he is. Sitting often on the sand dunes outside due to all the construction going on.

He is like my own child, actually he is my child, a part of me, of my very being, inseparable. Both mother and child, your biggest and most fantastic gifts to me. You have broken all limits in creating them, Lord, you have outdone yourself, you have peaked, you have reached perfection, beloved Mother. There is really no more you can give me now. I am complete, I am full. I only want to serve you and your children. I don't know how, I am still saddled with this identity, this "Me". I am willing to give up everything to serve you, Mother, Father. Take  this "I".

May all beings be liberated, may all be happy and at peace.