The beautiful litter

The four are still there. Someone came and took one, returned it, took another returned it, then took the brown one, returned that too. I am told a "mistri" at the opposite house will take the brown male.

What joy I feel when I pick them up. I keep going every couple hours to feed them. I just went. They were all outside with their mother. The moment I approached, they left her and came running to me. One day this immense joy will be a distant memory. Yesterday, we went to Niz and drove past where our earlier house was. I saw Chhota there. Sitting outside C-70 with his black friend. He looks amazingly like our Raja. I wondered whether I would feel anything if I got off the car and went to him. Less than 3 years back, when I dropped him back, I had wept sitting in the car.

Will these all be forgotten soon. After all, the pups of the previous litter who all died, are also faint memories.

Through all this, I still don't know what I am doing in this body. It's becoming very cold here, sooner than usual. Body is freezing. What do i get out of all this ? And what could I possible get from anything anyway?

Father, I wait for you. I wait for you, reality.  I wait for you, O Self.